


Petrichor

by kachicu



Category: Transformers - All Media Types
Genre: Angst, Angst and Feels, Crying, Hurt No Comfort, I can't stop writing angst help, Implied/Referenced Abuse, Mentioned Megatron, Rain, Starscream just wants to be happy, Thunderstorms, let him be happy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-09
Updated: 2019-11-09
Packaged: 2021-01-26 00:09:16
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 680
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21364945
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kachicu/pseuds/kachicu
Summary: Running from your problems isn't possible, but Starscream wishes it was.
Kudos: 21





	Petrichor

Starscream had regrets, and I mean a lot of them. Every moment of his existence was just endless pain he had to bear. His life was just a burden to those around him and he knew it as a fact. He didn't care what anyone said, no one truly cared about how he felt. And it was all because of that hell-spawned war.

He was so idiotic when he joined. He should have just run when he had the chance, but he didn't. He thought he could do something, and it only grew when he received the title of Second in Command. And with that title came the abuse and backlash that made him the mech he was today. He was an untrustworthy, backstabbing, lying seeker who assisted Megatron in a war that should have never even happened. But he was traumatized. He could never live a normal life because the demons of his past would always be there to remind him who he really was, and where he really belonged- or really, where he didn't belong.

Starscream inhaled shakily, frame rattling as the seeker forced himself to trudge through the woods with determination he didn't think was possible. And yet here he was, running. Running from his problems. Running from everything he knew he very well couldn't escape. He was stuck with this life and he just had to keep running. Running and running.

And now?

He was running for his life.

Again.

It was a common occurrence, so he couldn't find himself surprised much by it. He was always running. He could see why others saw him as a coward. But running was just his way to escape. If he didn't, he would have died a long time ago. He had been known to outwit death on multiple occasions, it was just something he was good at. And yet, he couldn't understand how it could be a skill to be proud of. Bots hated him. He hated himself. It was as simple as that.

Running was all he knew. And now? He was running from his leader for what could be counted as the millionth time.

Wings that were being held low were hanging onto his frame by a few sparking wires. Energon dribbled from multiple areas that were battered, washing into the grass as he trudged onwards. One of his optics was ripped out, an empty hole where it would have been. Warnings of low energon and such flashed onto his HUD yet he ignored them as he had done many times before.

He wished he wasn't always running. He wished he could just live a life that wasn't haunted by the constant fear of failing and abuse. He just wanted to be free.

He just wanted to feel safe.

The seeker tilted his helm up to squint at the sky. Rain pounded down harshly onto his battered frame and the mech couldn't bring himself to care. Why should he care? He was just a pawn. He wasn't supposed to feel bad. He was just supposed to do what he was told.

He was made to be broken and broken he was.

Starscream sniffled, ducking his helm as his legs threatened to give out from under him. Everything hurt and he wasn't sure he wanted to go on any longer. He wasn't sure if he could... Maybe tonight he would actually be granted the sweet relief of death...

He didn't deserve death.

This was just what he deserved.

Starscream stumbled and dropped to his knees, choking on a sob as his frame tipped over and fell like a dead weight on the ground. Tears spilled from his functioning optic as he vented shakily, frame trembling with the cold and his emotions.

Maybe he just wasn't supposed to be happy.

This was just who he was supposed to be.

A useless pawn.

His emotions didn't matter.

Star tilted his helm back, a tortured scream ripping itself free from his vocalizer. 

This was just who he was.

Rain poured, thunder roared, and with that, the sky mourned with him.


End file.
